Happy Sorren’s Life

There were two things that made me really sad today but because I received so many blessings and I know that people say things because that’s just the way they are or they have some things that they protect like their own heart and peace of mind that they become very defensive or hurt people just to feel the power over others… with that which I am also guilty of I forgive them and I move on with my life.

I can’t deny on the other hand that I’m hurt because my intensions and actions are being questioned or scrutinized that I tend to prove them wrong and suffer the consequence of my words before. That’s why it is always good not to utter hurtful words because it will not do any good for someone’s heart.

I learn everyday. I will start now as a new beginning. I’m so thankful that God gave me a happy heart that forgives. It cries but it smiles.

Every second counts… am so nervous right now. I want things to be perfect. I want to make sure that it will work. I like to end the nuisance disturbance.

It’s okay to be sad sometimes.

It’s okay to cry a little bit.

It’s okay not to consider what others may think.

It’s okay to make mistakes.

It’s okay to live.

It’s okay to be scared.

It’s okay to be in love.

It’s okay to sing.

It’s okay to be crazy.

It’s okay to be foolish every once in a while.

It’s okay to fight.

It’s okay to say sorry.

It’s such a crazy June. I am finally 27 but shocks I am still childish in some manners. I still can’t perfect work. I hope I get things done the way they should be done. I can do this. One more week and this month is finally over. I hope the stupid feeling and bad thoughts and actions be resolved… ah the imperfection of the human heart.

I don’t like unpleasant things to happen. I pray that everybody will be happy. I hope that no one will ever feel that he’s not loved. I hope everybody will be more compassionate and understanding and that grumpiness and pride are not a great foundation for living.

I wonder what the future holds. Sometimes, I felt like I lived my life with no regrets at all that I am finally at ease with the fact that I’ve got everything I needed. Now, I can tell God that His will be done. There are more things that I want to do, but I take them each day. I am in love with living and enjoying the moment. I hope everybody will have the feeling of peace and love in my heart right now.

I’m still high for watching the t.v. series “It Started With A Kiss”. The first plot for the show was when Xiang Qin was about to give her love letter to Zhi Shu, sounds familiar to me because I did it twice. I love to write so what do you expect from a crazy Sorren but to do that insane action. Although as I looked back, those two men was not really worth giving a letter because I stopped liking them. I can’t even remember the feeling anymore.

Right now, I got a big crush with someone and I am so desperate to know if there’ll be a chance that he’ll like me or if he likes me, so I am thinking of sending an email (hahahahaha technology changes everything) instead of the traditional love letter but I am still worried that after one more year I will not remember how I like him.

My sister was teasing me because on the show there were several times that the lead actress promised to stop loving Zhi Shu and so did I. I repeateadly told myself, friends, and sisters that I will stop liking him but I end up still thinking about him, missing him, and wishing one day I’ll found out why did I ever like him in the first place. Here I go again finding reasons and believe me I can think of so many justifications but one thing is sure though, I felt like it so pathetic to experience unrequited crush. I wanted to forget him really but I can’t. I want to feel normal when he’s around but deep within I still feel uneasy. Sigh… I just hope that I will keep my head high, never send a confession email, and simply make him an inspiration and not a source of heartache.

I’d been noticing the beautiful moon here in the Philippines starting last month. I love how it lights up the darkness and how I see things clearly with nature’s help without depending on street lights.

Today is the fifth day I got my mumps! I’m not proud! My cheeks are not yet even! My sisters was able to create new jokes about it – it’s fun – it’s a laughing stuff until now. Mama calls everyday to check on me. I can brush my teeth now without enduring pain afterwards.

I may say, the medicines helped a lot especially the pain reliever. Finally I love poison in this case. I forgot where I heard it but they say medicines are actually poison that’s why as much as I can I don’t take it; except maybe this time and later on if I still find it hard to be sane because of too much pain… I would still consult a doctor and take pills. Am almost well and can’t wait to live a normal life. Wait I didn’t have a normal life that’s why I caught the virus in the first place.

Sigh. I need to become more motivated to live a healthier life. Will power Sorren! I need to decide I want the total good life! I can do this.

I’m amazed again! Amazing when you like someone that you can’t help but connect him to the things around you. I see signs with his name, I see cars and I remember his, I hear songs that remind him or explain how I feel about him, etc. All these things make it harder to forget him. He’s such a lucky man being cared for well most of the time…

Sad that we don’t always get what we want but it sure have good reasons and it’s just a matter of time that the reasons will be revealed. Same old entries, same old topic, same old feeling, and as usual I know I’ll be able to move on better.

Vera Wang is promoting her new fragrance called “Princess” and I really like her cute site about the product because an online quiz is available to know what kind of princess are you. 

I read and write poetries in real life, I love coffee; hmmm will I meet a French Poet? How about a Filipino-Chinese Industrial Designer? Lovely! (^_^)

I read an e-mail from a friend and it’s about love is not enough to be in a relationship. Amazing how people become so confused about that beautiful feeling. Ladies over think it, people go crazily mad, all because we wanted it so much to stay within us. Being in love makes you feel so high, having that undeniable happiness, making you see the world as so much better… seeing his name, mentioning his name, replaying the sound of his voice inside your head… that beautiful feeling we wanted so much to last. But why can’t it last forever? Why challenge needs to become part of the process? Ah, the natural course of life… we get better as we encounter challenges that we need to overcome.

I’m really happy for all those people who found true love and having a good relationship with their partners. Lucky you! You are ready when the right person came along. Treasure the person you love. Amazing how you’ll trust a stranger to become part of your life. Amazing how courageous you all are to take that chances and never think about having your heart possibly be broken.

I can’t deny. I really like this man. I really can’t explain why? I don’t know if we’ll have a future together. I don’t like to expect. He just inspires me to have fun and make myself a better me. Love should be all about the beautiful feeling, there shouldn’t be fighting, negativity, hopelessness, hating, or any other sad sad thoughts and actions.